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Relationship questions/Answers




I have fallen for a lady 8 yrs elder, we both r married. We've never met talk on phone & share everything. I miss her if we don’t chat. What is this, should I continue? She says she feels for me, I make her happy and she likes my advice. And I feel for her too. Should I continue and if not how to forget her????

Asked by vickychd from India

Dear Vickychd,

It looks like a classic case of infatuation to me. These feelings you are having are temporary and wouldn’t last. You are only thinking about her a lot because it is something new and exciting in your life. Kind of like a forbidden fruit, you are married and she is married. The cruel world will not let you two come together it is “kabhi alvida na kehna” (a bollywood movie) all over again. Every body wants a piece of forbidden fruit at some point in their lives but remember where Adam and Eve ended up.

You are infatuated with her because the “idea” of her is exciting and you now feel like you have a lot in common with her. She understands you right! But mark my words if this woman comes into your life permanently and you have to be with her all the time, you will probably be bored with her in no time.

The more serious issue here is that you are looking for some excitement in your life and you should have it, after all we only live once. My advice is having an affair. You heard me right have an “affair” with your “wife”. Think of her as your new girlfriend. Buy her something pretty and take her out to a nice romantic dinner. Go away for a week end together if you could manage it. Treat her just as you will treat your girl friend.

I have a friend and she is happily married for more then fifteen years, when ever things get a little routine she and her husband hire a baby sitter for their kids and have quality alone time together. However for our date night my husband and I prefer to cook dinner together and then rent a nice DVD. It is up to you, how you want to spend quality time with your wife, the point is that you do. It keeps things fresh and exciting. Try it and you will be pleasantly surprised with your wife’s response.





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